Good, but not as good as the one I drank that wasn't mine.

I lost this soda in a bet. Instead of paying up, I'm drinking it. And the taste confirms that revenge is sweet.

We hate you, Andy Tippetts, for not showing up to 6am ball. And for getting to sleep in. Stupid Andy.

He made it and I didn't. Stupid Paul.

What he lacks in charisma, he makes up for in hair.

It was 6 am, I was half asleep, I didn't see you, people saw and laughed, and you were cold. But my inner child smiled.

If I never live to see another one of these, I'd die happy. Seriously, I'd be dead. It's the ultimate Catch-22.

It doesn't point, pluck, push or pick (at least not well). Some argue cuteness, but it's as useless as the swearing named after it.

For a dollar, this swatter not only kills flies with a satisfying bazzit, but kills time and maturity as well.